kimsbanded

24th July 2008

This morning I was told by Patrick that my band has slipped :(
After 15 months with my beloved band that has changed my life so much I have had a major bump in the road... When Patrick told me my band had slipped, I think I was shocked! I had done everything right I thought and this has happened. I hung up and balled my eyes out.

After a Monday full of pain I had a blood test which outruled Pancretitis, I then had an ultrasound which outruled Gallstones, then I had an xray to check the band - and slippage :(

I want to cry all night long, I haven't slept since Monday night, the pain gets worse if I eat and the night time is the worst of all - so much pain and can't get comfortable.. So like the story of my life, if its possible, it happens to us - we have the curse LOL.. As my family says - SHIT HAPPENS, and the man upstairs he likes to shit on us alot..

So I will pull it together and try and stop being a sook, and understand that I have lost over 70 kilos in 15 months, I finally have found a tool that has changed my life and cured me of obesity - but I will not let it go.. I love my band, so tomorrow I will have all my fill taken out to relieve some pain and then I will be booked in ASAP to have my band removed and replaced or repositioned. I have a list of questions ready for Patrick tomorrow so I will be sure to update you all tomorrow...

So I have decided to start this new page to tell another chapter in my story of getting to my goal weight, I am so close... I would have loved to have had my glory day and then have a slippage but ohwell, such is life, and as the page is called - Shit happens!! I will document as much as I can about band slippage and my journey in being fixed, its a hurdle in my race that I just have to jump to continue..

My Questions for Patrick tomorrow:
- Will my band be replaced or repositioned?
Hopefully repositioned, but replaced if it needs to be.
- How many days will I be in hospital for?
2 -3 nights if all goes well - hard to say
- I want to have surgery on the 5th August is that waiting too long?
Booked in for the 6th August
- Costs?
Approx $450 anathesist, and $500 excess on private health insurance
- Will I need to do Optifast again? (YUK)
Nope :) WOO HOO!!
- Will I need to do liquid and mushie stage?
Yes just like the first time
- What should I eat between getting fill out and operation?
Anything, just healthy :)
- Will he use the same incisions?
Probably not, because the skin has moved the scars now probably aren't in the right spot where he needs to be, so may need to do new holes.
- Why did it happen?
Unknown. maybe there was too much fill in the band
- What happens with fills after the band is fixed/replaced?
Same as last time 6 weeks after operation - 1st fill
- Can I exercise between now and surgery if pain is ok?
Should be fine
- Can you just removed my gallbladder why you are in there so I dont get gallstones, cause that will be the next issue?
No - complex operation dont have it done unless you need to.

Will let you all know the answers tomorrow :)

25th July

Well I am home from seeing Patrick this morning, all went well.. I have had all of my fill out, which was sad :( But that's ok, Patrick assured me it will all be ok. I am booked in for Wednesday 6th August to be operated on, the band will be moved into the proper spot if possible or replaced if it needs to be. The only reason I would come out of the operation without a band is if there is a complication and the spleen bleeds - i think thats what he said.. No hopefully I am not a complicated one and it all goes well, which I am sure i will.
I got all my answers answered (see above), Patrick laughs at me and my crazy lists, everyone who knows me knows I am an organisational freak that loves lists. But he just laughed and answere them all.
So I would have liked to have been able to get it done sooner but I simply can't I have the biggest day of the year for work, our Awards night and I am going - my dress cost so much and myself and our office are up for awards, so I really wanted to be there, and then next Friday 1st - Monday night 4th Luke and I are going away on a bit of a weekend away. I have organised it all and its a suprise he has no idea where we are staying.. A few people and you know who you are, know were we are staying.. So keep quiet!! So I didn't want to miss out on that, so thats why I have waited to the Wednesday 6th August.
In a way to be honest I am excited, excited about the next chapter in my life, excited I will no longer be in pain! Excited I will still have my band.. YEAH!! So I'm very positive now. Considering I have had all my fill taken out, I am not hungry and I am still sore, which I presume is normal considering the band is still slipped its now just not full with fluid. I will not do too much exercise before the operation to play it safe, but I will still walk everyday and do weights for my arms..

** 30th July 2008 **
Well this time next week I will have been rebanded or had my band repositioned. What a thought! The last few days have been a rollercoaster.. Firstly by not being able to eat solid food cause if I did it hurt so much, too the last day - 2 days of being hungry hungry hungry.. I ended up having a Kim mini breakdown last night and tried to eat so much food.. I was so hungry, I didnt spew and nothing got stuck, as I have no fill. But I suppose what I am most disappointed about is that after losing so much weight and changing my life, well so I thought I am obviously still addicted to food :( This makes me sad and depressed.. The band is my best friend and I dont think I like being without it. When I have fill, I am in control and food does not rule my life, cause I am not hungry, fill is out - I am hungry and my brain takes over the body and just wants to eat and eat.. So clearly I have some mental issues LOL, that need addressing.. You would think after this long I would hate food and realise it ruined my life, the band saved me :) But as soon as the fill was taken out and the band healed for a few days, I am back to thinking about food non stop.. I can't wait to have my band fixed up, I never want to be without it. Its depressing and sad :( Clearly this is why so many of us have had weight issues our entire lives, and why we never lost weight on diets, why because our heads are addicted to food and always hungry.. After eating 2 much last night, I then tried to start a fight with Luke - which never works, cause he never argues (oh what a sweetie:) ) followed then by self punishment. I am fat, I want to cry, I did cry, I need to exercise, Im going to get fat again :( This was very very depressing. I ended up not talking to Luke and going on the treadmill, then to bed to sleep and be sad :( I woke up feeling crap and went to work. Am feeling a bit better tonight, but still feel hungry which is a concern, I am going away on this suprise weekend with Luke, and I do not want to be thinking about food the entire time I have activities planned for us to do..I want my band back :( BAND, BAND, ARE YOU THERE!! PLEASE BE TOUGH AND STRONG WHEN I AM NOT, AND PROTECT ME FROM TOO MUCH FOOD! :) I love you band LOL.. I am clearly also possibly suffering from a breakdown LOL... Ah.. so 2 more sleeps and I am aware for 4 days then back for 1 before off for surgery...

** 5th August 2008 **
Well tomorrow is the day I will have my band fixed.. The pain has been ok over the past few days, a little bit of pain, but nothing too bad. The most annoying thing is the hunger, I can not still believe how automatically hungry I felt once the fill was taken out. It is crazy. It makes me definately understand why people who have the band removed put the weight they have lost back on, I never want my band removed. I want it forever! It helps control my hunger, when my band is filled, I am in control, when I have no fill, the hunger is unbelievable. This is the kind of thing I think needs to be looked at by some medical researcher, this is why diets have never worked in the past, we are 100% addicted to food. Even Luke made the comment last night, although I haven't been able to eat much, since having my fill out, I keep watching cooking shows and reading recipe books, without me even noticing I was really doing it, how strange.. we are just addicted to food, in any shape or form, I also made about 12 meals for Luke when I am in hospital, again because i am addicted to the food - weird. Well I can't wait to be in control again once my band is fixed :)

** 10th August 2008 **
Well I am home... and the great news is I still have my Band and it is all fixed :) YEAH!! Wednesday morning Luke drove me into Epworth Private at 7am and Patrick had told me I was first on the list.. I went up to Day Surgery and had all my information checked and they put Emla cream on my hands for the drip. (for those of you who are scared of needles Emla is the best, it is a numbing cream you can get from the chemist and I always put it on the area of my port before I have a fill).. So I sat in the waiting area with Luke and Mum and waiting to be called up. I again met with the Anatheisist who was so impressed with my weight loss to date, I was then taken into the changeroom to put on the gown. Now this was such a great moment, the first time I had my band put in I cried so much because the gown wouldn't even fit me, this time it did and it wrapped around me and fitted so well, it was a great feeling.. I then had to put on those great stockings and then lied on the bed waiting to be taken in. Patrick then came over and said hello and he reminded me that when he gets in to my tummy, if the band is damaged, I might come out and not have a band, and if that is the case, not to worry cause he will put a new one in again in 3 months time. This made me nervous because I really didnt want to be without my band :( I was then taken into the operating theatre where they are all so lovely and then all talked about how much weight I had lost and how great the band had been for me. I begged them all, number 1 priority please try and keep my band in... And that was the last thing I remember, then I woke up in recovery, the nurse came over and said are you ok, are you in pain? I said I'm ok its a bit sore, but do I still have my band, and she said YES.. I cried... I was so happy to still have my band :) :) :) So the journey begins again... Liquid stage, then mushie, then solids.. I stayed in for 2 nights, and had a morphine drip the first day and then panadeine forte. I have a bad rash on my legs, and I chucked a few times from the morphine, so they also put an anit nausea medicine in my drip, which made me feel better. Christine from Patrick's office came up and saw me both days which was great, and so did Patrick. The pain is ok, similar to last time really, I feel its a bit tighter as far as I haven't been able to drink as much liquid as I could last time, Patrick said this was because my stomach would still have the indent from where the band was, and then the new placement of the band, so I might not be able to drink as much as last time. So I am just sipping everything very slowly :) The main thing I miss is chewing :) and exercising, cause I dont want to damage my new band placement, so I am trying to behave :) So the band slippage is all fixed, and I am onto the new chapter of my Band Journey :) Thank you everyone for your well wishes.. It is great to know that I have such a great support network.

Piczo